I firmly believe that confidence building and providing environments where youth can become authentically strong, smart, and bold should start early on so I was very distressed to learn the differences in the two organizational oaths.

Here are the two oaths:

Girl Scout Oath

On my honor I will try to serve God and my country,

To help other people at all times, and to live by the Girl Scout Law.

Boy Scout Oath

On my honor I will do my best

To do my duty to God and my country and to obey the Scout Law;

To help other people at all times;

To keep myself physically strong, mentally awake, and morally straight.

******

What irks me the most is how the Girl Scouts take an oath to try and serve while the Boy Scouts swear that they will do their best to help others.  Besides the obvious brevity in the Girl Scout Oath, I take umbrage with the fact that we are not empowering the girls of today to become the “doers” of tomorrow. There is no shame in trying but the verbiage does not exude confidence and strength in my humble opinion.

In all fairness, my research unearthed that Girl Scouts do some amazing things and are committed to fostering confidence, volunteerism, diversity, societal issues, and scholarship but the oath was coined in 1912 so ladies, please consider a revision!

The messaging we send to our children shapes their behavior as adults and I believe that Girl Scouts deserve to do their best just as Boy Scouts. It all boils down to gender messaging and eventually filters into the workplace when these girls reach adulthood.

If we can provide them with a non gender based opportunity to discover their strengths, do good work, and pay-it-forward to help others then we will move forward in breaking down the gender barriers that are still alive in the professional workplace today.

So the next time you buy Girl Scout cookies, ask your young scout what she is doing and applaud her for her good work.

Diva tips to ramp up your professional poise!

Nooyi believes that leaders must balance their IQ with their EQ – or emotional intelligence to be effective. The EQ factor empowers women with an advantage to relate directly to their colleagues and customers because they can “…bring their whole selves to work,” according to Nooyi. This combination of empathy, active listening, strength, resilience, and ambition will serve women leaders well.

Sadly, only 12 women hold CEO positions at Fortune 500 companies at this time but the tide is turning and women stand poised to assume more leadership roles. Nooyi believes that women leaders have an advantage over their male counterparts because they can add humanity to a position and nurture without losing effectiveness.

At a recent conference, Nooyi shared her 5 C’s of Effective Leadership which we can all learn from.

Competency – stand out from the pack and be a lifelong learner. Remain ahead and stay abreast in your field.

Courage and Confidence – speak out. Establish your knowledge base and be confident as a leader.

Communication – over-invest in written and oral communication.  Leaders constantly need to motivate their troops.

Consistency – remaining steady, reliable, and determined allows for credibility and a baseline to measure your success and failures.

Compass – integrity is critical in leadership.

At 19, Marcy left her native Ohio and moved to Los Angeles to discover the world and landed a job at an upscale home improvement center in Beverly Hills. This career move satisfied her need for hands-on work and soon she became a Buyer for the store and was fully immersed in all aspects of building and home renovation. But it was a flier posted in the store that launched Marcy’s artistic career and turned her hobby into an eventual livelihood.

And So It Began

The flier announced a workshop about learning to throw on a pottery wheel. Marcy immediately found her passion and immersed herself into this new hobby. For $50 a month she got a key to the studio, a shelf for her work, and access to the firing kiln. She was in pottery heaven.

While the newfound avocation was feeding her artistic soul, she still needed a day job to feed herself. She moved on from the home improvement store and put her artistic abilities to work at a landscape design business since she always loved plants. She focused on interior landscape designs for homes, offices, and restaurants and became an expert with succulents, cacti, and orchids in particular, creating art with living specimens.

Choosing the Hobby over the Day Job

While the landscape design work paid the bills and gave her another artistic outlet, it did not satisfy Marcy the same way that her ceramics studio did. In 1991 she made the bold decision that she liked her hobby better than her day job. She decided that she really wanted to go back to school to formalize her education and earn a degree that would empower her with the skills to broaden her career prospects.

In the 1990’s Marcy was able to take advantage of a thriving California college system where she could take course work at the community college level and transfer credits towards a university degree anywhere in the state. She quit the day job with the landscape design firm and went to school full-time, pursuing freelance landscaping gigs on the side. She enhanced her income selling her beloved pottery which began to establish her reputation as a working artist.

After earning a Bachelor of Fine Arts – B.F.A. degree from California State University-Long Beach, Marcy was hungry for more education. She applied to several Masters of Fine Arts in Ceramics programs nationally and eventually accepted a full scholarship at Indiana University in Bloomington where she pursued a 3 year degree that gave her teaching experience as well as studio time to develop her ceramic art.

The Hoosier Heartland

The decision to come to Indiana University was easy as far as the MFA program was concerned but in the late 1990’s graduate student housing was very hard to come by in Bloomington and this almost prevented Marcy from accepting the scholarship. With the affordability of the Midwestern cost of living compared to the California economy where everything cost more, Marcy was able to buy a condominium for ½ of what her rent would be in California and her return to the Midwest was a done deal.

And so the journey began to hone her art and gain teaching experience to make her full-time career as an artist a reality. Marcy soon learned that she enjoyed teaching and was good at it but after she minted the MFA, finding a faculty position was very difficult. The classic budget cuts for the arts (then and now) made it hard to find a permanent university appointment. She landed a one year position as a visiting assistant professor at a private college in southern Indiana, and another year was spent working in a hybrid position at a university in Pennsylvania as an art instructor and art gallery director until the next round of budget cuts when her position was eliminated.

Feast or Famine

With a passion for her art and a determination to make this career fly, Marcy decided to move back to Bloomington, IN where she kept her condo (renting it to a roommate while she was away) and set a personal deadline of 4 years to make it work.

With business savvy and marketing experience from her previous home improvement and landscape design jobs, Marcy set out to grow her own ceramic studio business. With patience and fortitude, Marcy has successfully shown and sold her pieces at nationally juried art fairs, exhibitions, and galleries. It’s a laborious administrative process to apply for these opportunities to sell and show your work which makes it challenging to find enough time in the studio. But Marcy is committed to staying positive and channeling her energy to create her art.

The Artist’s Way

Marcy talked about a mental shift she embraced a few years back to help herself think outside of the box and sustain her positivity. She attended a workshop by Esther and Jerry Hicks which revolutionized her thinking and helped her focus on abundance, appreciation, and the law of attraction.

Marcy shared that it’s easy for artists to succumb to self doubt about their work. Will someone like this? Is it good enough? These are frequent questions for artists of all stripes but especially for fine artists who sell their work for a living. Marcy also credits the book The Artist’s Way by Julia Cameron because it liberated her to make art because she loves to – not because she has something to sell.

Giving herself permission to do what she loves when creating her pottery has actually improved her work and Marcy’s buyers/collectors are excited to see what she has in store that’s new. Her body of work is always growing and changing and Marcy finds this intellectually and artistically stimulating.

A Hybrid Approach

Marcy’s own words best describe her hybrid approach:

“Abstractions of plant-life and the microscopic world are represented in the organic forms and surfaces I invent, searching to find a balance between man and nature, and science and nature.  Branches, roots, bones, and microorganisms are some of the ingredients that occupy my imagination.   Biological plant-like forms coming alive, growing, and aging are part of my visual language and serve as inspiration in the creation of my sculptures and functional vessels.  Each new series I create takes on a new title, such as, Organisms, Life-Forms, Hybrids, and Bio-Morphs.  It is the idea of the “history of life forms” – individual as well as universal.  I remember the first time I looked at plant tissues under a microscope.  They were alive, moving, foreign, and intimidating.  I felt uncomfortable and mesmerized in the same instance.  Complex organic forms and unique glazed surfaces are invented from my imagination, but inspired by nature and plant life.”

“My organic clay sculptures and functional vessels incorporate many different ceramic techniques; from paper clay slabs, which enables me to build large pieces that are very lightweight, to pinched coils and wheel thrown and molded parts. I am interested in the repeated layering of glazes, which encrusts the surface with texture, to the extent that it no longer is recognizable as a traditional ceramic surface.  This process includes a layering of custom made glazes, hand painted ceramic pigments, and multiple kiln firings.  The black and white painted surfaces are glaze fired two or three times.  Using ceramic pigments mixed with water, I paint with them over an already glazed surface. The paintings melt and fuse into the glaze in the subsequent glaze firing.”

Ideas such as transformation and mutation are important in the creation of her visual language.  Marcy wants the layers of the form and the surface to create an edgy tension within each piece, and imply life and history.  She is interested in portraying odd, quirky, foreign, and alien life forms; suggesting breathing living organisms, and transforming them into cultivated forms about life.

Since Marcy is a true hybrid artist combining sculpture and pottery, her work is very unique. She doesn’t plan most of her creations – she just let’s them evolve and happen. It’s the act of going into the studio and creating that still brings her great joy.

Wearing Multiple Hats

But the reality of a working artist is that she has to balance making art with making a living. So, Marcy teaches art classes at the Ivy Tech Center for Lifelong Learning and is a member of the Local Clay Potter’s Guild as well as the Visual Arts Guild-Arts Alliance in Bloomington. She was commissioned to work on a mural project with a local school and created a relief sculpture celebrating student diversity and what they loved about their school.

Future plans include growing her inventory since she has been very successful recently at art shows and exhibitions and must get back into her studio to create new pieces for upcoming shows. Her website is a work-in-progress and Marcy chips away at finishing the site when she has the time and inclination since she has a full schedule with teaching and making art. She has learned to prioritize so she can maintain her creative energy and a positive outlook.

An Artful Life

The internet has changed Marcy’s life as a working artist. She relies on referrals from satisfied customers and collectors but the internet has empowered her to network effectively beyond her client base. Marcy credits her mentors for their support and enthusiasm and believes in paying-it-forward to other emerging artists. She built a house a few years ago and shares her studio basement with several local artists to help them move forward on their artistic journey.

Marcy has a mantra of doing the best that she can each day – if it doesn’t get done, that’s ok. She is committed to being happy with what she does accomplish and is grateful for the opportunity to earn a living making art.

Marcy’s Advice and Action Steps:

• Give yourself permission to change.
• Work is always growth.
• Make choices and be confident.
• Know what you want to say to the world and make it work.
• Reward yourself for your accomplishments.

Quote:

“If you want to make art, just make it. It’s not about selling – it’s about making what you love.”

Marcy Neiditz

Resources:

Marcy’s website: http://www.marcyneiditz.com

Since 2005, Danielle has planned both intimate and large scale weddings and corporate events including some of New York City’s largest and most notable businesses. Located in the Big Apple, Curtain Up Events services the tri-state and greater New York area but Danielle also travels out of state for destination events.

Use Self Discovery for Career Transformation

She shared with me that she hit the wall as a performer and wanted self validation as a person and not just as an actress. It was a vulnerable self discovery process that helped her to realize that she was ready to leave the arts, and a very emotional decision. After many tears and a lot of deliberation about this major life and career change, Danielle was ready to reinvent herself and moved forward with confidence and conviction.

As an actress, she had worked many a catering gig when not performing and since her Mom was a professional caterer, she grew up surrounded by people in the special events industry. After leaving show biz, Danielle developed phenomenal vendor contacts from a 2 ½ year stint at another event planning firm where she worked prior to launching CUE. She received excellent reviews from colleagues and customers who encouraged her to set out her own shingle. Danielle combined her creative flair and business acumen to plan innovative and chic events under her new business name and thus, Curtain Up Events was born.

By the way, Madeline, Danielle’s 2 year old daughter was also born in 2009 and this working Mom was producing events up until a week before she gave birth. She also returned to work shortly after Madeline was born but does the logistical event planning from home to be closer to her daughter.

You Can’t Move Forward Without Taking a Risk

Launching her own business was quite a risk but Danielle is experiencing a validation that she finds very empowering. Her feedback from clients and vendors has been amazing and being her own boss has given her the freedom to make her own business decisions and design her work schedule around raising a daughter.

As a proverbial Stage Manager, Danielle calls all the shots in her business and enjoys having the opportunity to work with fabulous people designing special events that make people joyful.

“If you’ve ever been backstage during a performance, there are so many things going on which keep the show running that the audience never sees.  The same is true for a wedding.  I’m calling a million different cues, but the guests just enjoy a seamless event.  My musical-theater background also enables me to have a long list of theatrical vendors such as Tony-nominated lighting designers and Broadway performers that can make the day a little more spectacular.

Overall, I think the most unique thing I employ is my ability to connect with people.  A wedding is a very personal event and all of the special touches should reflect the couple and not me.  Those special touches will make people say “that wedding was so THEM.”

Her work and creative ideas appear on Brides.com, where she consults for numerous wedding planning stories. She was also a key producer on a team that planned an episode of “My Celebrity Wedding,” which aired on The Style Network.

The challenge for this working Mom is balancing work with raising a daughter. Danielle wants to be an inspiration and a role model for her daughter but admits “… sometimes you just have to budget to have someone watch the baby.”

“My biggest challenge is balancing work and personal life.  My daughter is very important to me and I constantly feel guilty about not spending enough time with her.  I know that I really do give her everything she needs and then some.  But, you’re always second guessing yourself and I’m always working at odd hours.  There’s always work to be done when you own your own company.  Even if the clients are completely taken care of, you still have to tend to the company itself.

You really have to have an amazing support system.  I have wonderful friends and family who are all hands on deck because they love me and believe in my company.  I also have an AMAZING group of women who work with me.  I couldn’t do it without them and I tell them every chance I get. If you think you can do everything yourself, you’ll just be running yourself ragged.  It’s so important to let others help you!!”

The curtain will rise and fall many times throughout our career lifetimes. Danielle found her passion a second time and serves as an inspiration for others who are looking for that next career opportunity. She deserves a standing ovation!

Danielle’s Advice

• Do what you love! I found something else I love, beyond my original career plan. I’m good at it and it makes me happy. Give yourself the opportunity to explore new things and find what you love.
• Take a risk – it could take you someplace wonderful.
• Be open to many things – you just might find something you never thought you would.
• Women can be competitive in the workplace so learn to work together and support each other and everybody wins.
• Always treat people with respect – sometimes it’s contagious and that’s a good thing.

Quote:

Danielle’s mantra is one she learned from Savor the Success – “Give, Give, Get” She is a firm believer in the power of giving and lives by the belief that you can’t please everybody all the time.

Resources

CUE www.curtainupevents.com

Savor the Success: www.savorthesuucess.com

Learn how making someone’s day can infuse positive energy into your life!

Fear is natural and it can be very difficult to remain calm under pressure but you need to learn how to act confidently even if your heart is racing a mile a minute on the inside. When I am coaching my students and clients in mock interviews, I encourage them to have their game face on and approach the interview with confidence and their authentic personality, even if they are scared to death on the inside.

Imagine that person in your professional world who stands tall with humble confidence and exudes composure at all times. She seems to have it all together and you wish you could behave like her under pressure. You can and should emulate that confident person and practice holding it together when your nerves get the best of you. The truth is she may be just as scared as you are but she has developed a technique to lead with a confident persona and it works.

You set your audience at ease when you exude a confident and friendly persona as well. It’s torture watching someone who is terrified present or interview and no matter how well prepared they are, the focus is on their emotional distress and not their brilliant content.

Whether you are in a job interview, a board room presentation, or a public speaking engagement, tap your inner Meryl Streep and bring on a command performance. Work with a coach doing role play scenarios or practice with a trusted advisor so you can perfect your technique.

You can smell fear a mile away but a simple smile can be the best technique to let others know you are confident. By the way, in a recent interview, Meryl Streep confessed to severe stage fright before live performances but you would never know it!

• Gather information that supports your idea. Find statistics that show the potential success of your proposal with relevant examples.
• Write your idea out on paper before you pitch your boss. What seems great in your head can be refined once you see it in writing. It’s always a good idea to present your boss with a written proposal (be sure to include your name) so he/she can process it after you have left the meeting.
• Prepare best case scenarios of your idea in action and be ready for what-if questions. Help your boss envision the positive things that may happen as a result of your idea. Illustrate potential successes.
• Approach your boss at the appropriate time for your pitch – ideally during a down time or a scheduled meeting on a slower day. Never pitch at the end of the day or on the fly, walking to another meeting. With a scheduled appointment you have a captive audience and the boss’s full attention.
• Be respectful, especially if your boss is not immediately thrilled with your idea. Give him/her time to process it and be open to tweaking your idea to accommodate her suggestions. Always show your gratitude for the opportunity to make a proposal and plan to circle back for feedback after your boss has had a chance to digest the proposal.

Be sure to maintain good eye contact when you present your ideas – this shows confidence and strength and sets the tone for the encounter. Don’t be afraid to propose your suggestions. Even if all your ideas are not embraced, it shows initiative, creativity and it pays to take a risk to get your ideas heard.

I meet many individuals who just don’t believe they have the power to change their career lot. Often they feel victimized and lack the self confidence to take a risk or seriously consider what they want out of a new career.

Sheets advocates for a technique called “fake it till you make it” – a self esteem builder that presupposes that you have the ability to take control of the situation, convey your needs, and make a decision. This paradigm shift helps to bypass self doubt and ignores the lack of confidence that paralyzes so many people.

The concept is simple – you make a decision and implement it with conviction, regardless of whether you think you are doing the right thing.  Sheets believes the technique works wonders if you “work it” and follow the implementation with conviction honestly.

She believes we all possess the knowledge to change any situation. The “fake it till you make it” exercise can help prove that you have the capabilities and all you need to do is practice until you prove it to yourself. Sheets also suggests these tactics to off-set the feelings of self doubt.

• Find supportive people who affirm your ideas.
• Use positive self talk to derail the negative tapes that play in your head.
• Find groups that support and encourage you to trust yourself.
• Practice the “fake it till you make it” technique until you convince yourself that you do indeed know what you are doing.

I agree with Sheets that we have the knowledge to change any situation including ultimate career satisfaction. But it takes a conscious effort to alter a situation to make it more palatable or work on a problem to alleviate issues. By faking it until the change becomes real, we give ourselves permission to solve these issues with the inherent wisdom we already possess.

Take some baby steps with this new technique and give yourself a safe opportunity to seek out change. You may start owning your decision making ability and re-discover your self confidence as you finally admit that you have had the ability to change all along.

I recently read an article by Jamie where she discussed how to unearth and nurture an employee’s strengths. Often the job performance reviews focus on weakness without highlighting strengths. She notes how a spotlight on weakness may result in a self fulfilling prophecy, where you build a poor image of an employee and she performs “down to her potential” which breeds mediocrity from someone with star potential.

Jamie and I are kindred spirits on the strengths quest mission. I am committed to helping individuals understand that they are not broken and if they focus on their strengths instead of their weaknesses they will thrive in careers that speak to their passions and provide true satisfaction.

Here are some action steps Jamie details that apply to both the boss and the employee. If you are an enlightened boss you will use these strategies to uncover the strengths of your team members. If you are a frustrated employee, you can deftly suggest these tactics to your boss.

Make time for positive recognition. Take the time to express genuine positive feedback on jobs well done. Be specific and share examples and watch your colleagues walk taller and embrace their inner confidence. According to Jamie, the benefit is two-fold: the employee knows what behaviors are most valued, and you help shift your thinking from “can’t do” to “there is potential here.”

Identify ways to apply existing strengths in new ways. What qualities has your staff member demonstrated and how can you utilize these to fulfill needs in your organization? Don’t be limited by the job title. Your receptionist may be an ideal project manager, so throw traditional responsibility norms out the window, according to Jamie.

Ask your employee what she likes to do. Imagine that – someone asking what you like to do! To avoid the all too common phenomenon of the Peter Principle where every employee rises to his level of incompetence, tap into what your staff member really likes to do. Find out what she believes is her most valuable contribution to the organization and unleash her to do what she believes she does best.

Turn a weakness on its head. Jamie suggests that instead of chastising an employee for her weakness, look to the exact opposite of that task to unearth a possible strength. It’s certainly worth discussing with your colleague and chances are if she is not a good closer, it may be because she is a fine idea generator.

Test-drive a new role. You may have hired an employee for a specific role but in time you realize that she would be utilizing more of her strengths in a difference function for the organization. Consider what Jamie calls a mini internship program, where employees shadow co-workers to learn more about the roles and needs of the company. This test drive could spark new ideas for the boss and the employee and a role-shift could be the best and most expedient way to use existing talent in a new way to meet company goals and develop satisfied employees.

Cheers to Jamie for illustrating very specific ways to uncover our strengths at work!